Was Fish a Weasel?

Queen Shenaynay

My good and very astute friend Mama Squirrel at Dewey's Treehouse blog has posted a couple of fascinating bits on "weasel words" this week. Beehive scholars are hereby notified that The Queen is Amused, and may begin at any time to throw this phrase about, both in passing -- breezily and assumingly, no doubt -- and in the proverbial red ink on school assignments. So it behooves all to pay a virtual call upon the Treehouse post haste, and prepare yourselves to Beware of Weasel Words henceforth and anon.

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This weasel words business reminds me of a phrase we toss about at The Beehive: TFC.

I knew a handsome fellow named Fisher in college who was a master of stating the obvious, in a value-free sort of way, when a compliment was really what was called for.

Examples:
"You're wearing a dress today."
"You made a lot of lasagna."
"Your hair is lighter."
"You look different today."

[OK, Fish... and your point is?]

His chums began to refer to these as Typical Fisher Comments, or TFC for short.

We took up lightheartedly mocking him in response:
"Good, Fish, good. Now, tell us all how you Feeeeeeel About It."
"Opinions Can Be Your Friends, Fish."
"Step 2: Emote about the lasagna."

And so on.

We tried to persuade him that this was a most efficient way to kill a good conversation. I urged him to Just Say No to becoming the Master of Cosmic Duh. His mother read Emily Post to him over dinner. All to no avail. When I graduated from college, he said, "My. You've graduated." Four years later, when I invited him to my wedding... well, you can guess. And that's my point. Dull, dull, dull.

He really was quite intelligent, and very well read. There was just no accounting for it.

I haven't seen Fisher in fifteen years, but TFC lives on: my acerbic offspring have picked it up. So when one daughter says to the other "Your toenails are pink," or "That outfit is new," the other will snarkishly indict: "TFC."

Very Useful, like I said.